Finding Yourself in Boundary Setting

This Week’s Book = Boundaries: Where You End and I Begin (by A. Katherine)

Weird story…a few weeks ago, it was one of those weeks when all of my clients seemed to be experiencing very similar trials and tribulations.   I found myself discussing boundaries a lot that week – often a challenging, confusing, and uncomfortable topic for my clients.  I found myself wishing that I had some new ways to describe boundaries…then lo and behold, when I went into a local used bookstore (@BeanAroundBooks) on one of my breaks, this book was on the shelf!

BoundariesBoundaries: Where You End and I Begin is a bit of an older book (published in 1991), but it offers some great descriptions and information about boundaries.  In the book, Anne Katherine describes the various types of boundaries, what boundaries are for, and why we want to have them.  She uses many examples throughout the book to illustrate boundaries and boundary-less situations.  Specifically, she discusses boundaries in the context of close and intimate relationships.  The end of the book is devoted to helping readers build and recognize boundaries.

You know, I found this book useful.  Given the publication date, I figured that the information would be a bit stale.  I was pleasantly surprised to find that the definitions, descriptions and examples seem to transcend time.  It was clear how passionate the author was about the topic of boundaries, particularly when discussing physical boundaries.  She actually gets a little mom-like when discussing that your body is your own and you get to choose who touches it and how.  That part felt a bit like a lecture…though a necessary one.  The most interesting parts of the book for me were the stories that were used as examples and I think that many readers will recognize themselves in those scenarios.  In my opinion, the book achieves what the title promises – it describes in explicit (but also simplistic) detail how boundaries define us as individual from others.

Interested in the book? Click here.

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