Mindfulness

Jumping on the Yearly Recap Bandwagon (Part 1)

December 14, 2015 | Leave a Comment

Well, 2015 is winding down to an end and I feel like it went fast. I also feel like that’s something that everyone says. While I’m not super down with making New Year’s resolutions, I am a huge fan of yearly recaps You know, like “10 Most Unexpected Breakups of the Year” or “The Top 25 Dresses of 2015”…ok I may have just revealed my guilty pleasure of reading celebrity gossip blogs and magazines. Ah well. Anywho, since I’ve read and blogged about 27 books this year, I’ve decided to jump on the yearly recap bandwagon and give you my “Top 10 Most Helpful Books” list. Of course, this is a completely biased list, based purely on my personal likes and dislikes, so take from it what you will…

#10: 10% Happier (D. Harris)
This was the first book that I blogged about, so I think that it holds a special place for me. It’s also hilarious…and I think that we all know by now that I’m won over by humour. 10% Happier is about one man’s journey through experiences with anxiety, panic, drug use, medication, and mindfulness. Honesty, humour, and openness are foundational to this book and likely the key to its overwhelming success.

#9: The Last Walk (J. Pierce)
Ok, so this book may be the polar opposite of the previous book. The Last Walk discussed in depth the process of and the grief that accompanies the loss of a pet. A much more serious and morose topic, but also a very important one. The author’s grief is obvious throughout the book and any pet owner will find themselves brimming with empathy and gaining understanding as they read it.

#8: Bald is Better with Earrings (A. Hutton)
Aaaaaand back to less serious…ok that sounds weird when discussing a book on breast cancer. Weird, but true. It’s all about tone in this book, as the author writes in a more informal and easily accessible style. This book would be insanely helpful for all people dealing with breast cancer, as well as family members and friends. The author gives an extremely candid window into all of the processes associated with breast cancer treatment and recovery.

#7: The Five Love Languages (G. Chapman)
This one’s a classic…corny terminology aside. Everybody seems to have heard of this book and the content, in my opinion, is pretty legit. The Five Love Languages looks at how different people give and receive love, how emotional needs are met, and how couples can heal issues in their relationship by looking at those “love languages.” This book is super helpful for people looking to better their relationships.

#6: Boundaries: Where You End and I Begin (A. Katherine)
This is another super helpful book, as everyone seems to struggle with defining boundaries and implementing them. Boundaries does just that – it defines boundaries, gives a multitude of examples, and discusses boundaries in a variety of contexts. Despite being an older book, the information is still helpful today.

Check out my top 5 next week!

Agreeing to Better Yourself

November 9, 2015 | Leave a Comment

This Week’s Book = The Four Agreements: Companion Book (by M. Ruiz)

After revisiting an old book a few weeks ago, I’ve been feeling motivated to re-read more books on my shelf. The book that I’ll chat about this week is one that I bought over 10 years ago. I remember buying it at the suggestion of my counsellor at the time – I was in such a messy stage at that point that I trusted every recommendation and idea that she presented to me. As I picked up this book again, I remembered that this was one time that she led me astray – this was a book that I did not particularly like, though over 10 years later I couldn’t tell you why. But alas, I believe in giving some things a second try, so here we go…

The Four Agreements: Companion Book is the follow up book to Miguel Ruiz’s original book The Four Agreements. Ruiz uses this book to expand on the concepts discussed in his first book, further discuss the application of those concepts, and to provide readers with an author interview that delves even further into the content. The Four Agreements are as follows: be impeccable with your word, don’t take anything personally, don’t make assumptions, and always do your best. Ruiz states that, if you are able to live your life by these agreements, you will be happy and living in the moment.

Ok, so this book actually tells me to say what I mean and be impeccable with my word. So here it goes…I can’t even handle this book. No, I don’t mean that in a fun, colloquial way. I’m serious. I had barely read past the first sentence of the book’s dedication when I remembered exactly why I did not enjoy this book over 10 years ago. It is 100% not the style of writing that I like at all – it’s very mystical and fanciful…not my cup of tea. As someone who prefers science, I find it hard to care about or even wrap my head around the things discussed in this book, like the Parasite, Book of Law, and the Judge (yes, those things are all capitalized throughout the book). I frequently caught myself zoning out, so I quickly accepted that, despite my best efforts, this book would be a skimmed one.

Now, with all of that being said, I do have an appreciation for the Four Agreements themselves. Not all the airy-fairy explanations, but the four actual statements. I can see the value in each of them and I have tried to apply them in my own life. I can also see nuggets of useful information throughout the book. Unfortunately, those pieces are often so mired by the style of writing that they can be hard to pick out. So, here’s my honest opinion (again) – if you enjoy the style of writing that I’ve described, that’s cool – pick up this book. Some people really like it (as evidenced by the success stories at the end of the book), but I’m just not one of them. If you and I are the same in our preference for more structured, realistic, and even science-based writing, pick up this book, read the dust jacket (where the Four Agreements are listed), and put it back on the shelf. Knowing and contemplating the Four Agreements will be beneficial for anyone.

Interested in the book? Click here.

Depression, Mindfulness, and Self-Compassion

June 29, 2015 | Leave a Comment

This Week’s Book = Uncovering Happiness: Overcoming Depression with Mindfulness and Self-Compassion (by Elisha Goldstein)

Luckily, my unhappy dive into evolutionary psychology last time did not deter me from my goal to read some more informational books. I have been actively seeking a book on depression – I hadn’t read a new book about depression in a while and this one showed up near the top of all my searches. I’ll admit, this book somewhat drew me in with its cheerful appearance and inspirational title. I mean, who doesn’t want to uncover happiness? And a jolly blue cover with a bright yellow flower/sun thing? Great!

This book allows readers to gain a greater understanding of depression and what is going on in the brain when depression is occurring. Elisha Goldstein manages to provide very simple definitions of somewhat complex processes, while offering much encouragement to the readers. Right from the introduction, Goldstein endeavours to inspire hope in the readers by providing a multitude of examples and easy to complete strategies. Among other things, Goldstein discusses the creation/breaking of habits, the natural anti-depressant brain, mindfulness, and self-compassion.

In all honesty, I was drawn to this book because of its mention of self-compassion in the title. When I started reading, I quickly discovered that this book discussed two of my favourite concepts: self-compassion and neuroplasticity (put very simply, the brain’s ability to change and form new pathways). I often find myself discussing those concepts with my clients. Like me, other professionals may also appreciate the simplistic description of depression and the concepts and be able to use them in sessions with clients. I found this book to be very easy to read and interesting, though there were some moments when I felt the writing was a bit corny (or perhaps that’s just my dislike for generic mantras creeping in). I think that this book would be a super useful tool for people experiencing depression, as it gives plenty of easy to understand information and some straightforward strategies to try (there is even a section called ‘The Natural Antidepressant Toolkit’). This is a book with a cheerful cover and a realistic message.

Interested in this book? Click here.

Making a Difference by Formulating Happiness

May 11, 2015 | Leave a Comment

This Week’s Book = The Happiness Project (by Gretchen Rubin)

After reading some heavier books on trauma, I decided to pick a less intense book for this week. Cue The Happiness Project – one woman’s year long quest to increase her happiness by making some simple shifts in her everyday life.

This book is autobiographical in nature, but it’s also a fantastic mix of research, quotes, and opinions. I was actually pretty impressed with the seamless way that Rubin could weave those elements together. Through all of her research, she increased her understanding of happiness and created her own happiness project. Essentially, her happiness project consisted of having a specific focus for each month (i.e. relationships, work, etc.) and different goals to increase her happiness in the specified area (i.e. start a blog, go to sleep earlier, etc.).

I liked this book…though I didn’t love it. I loved the idea behind the book and the discussion of happiness. I loved the interweaving of research and personal experiences. But I was not a fan of Rubin’s ‘writing voice.’ Throughout the book, we are privy to Rubin’s inner monologue: her worries, revelations, and general thoughts. I found myself getting annoyed often by the self-critical nature of her the_happiness_project_book_by_gretchen_rubin writing and, in my most annoyed moments, I found myself questioning her motives. At times, I almost felt like she was trying too hard to be transparent and it came off as attention seeking. So alas, I can’t love a book when I don’t like the writer’s voice.

With that being said, this book is an easy and entertaining read. I would recommend it to anyone who is seeking new and straightforward ideas of how to improve their happiness. For professionals, there are some interesting tidbits to be found amongst the research that Rubin summarizes. I know that I’ve made use of some of the research discussed in some of my recent sessions. While Rubin’s formula for happiness is not the solution to all unhappiness, it appears as though it can certainly make a bit of a difference.

Want to buy the book? Click here!

This Made Me 10% Happier

April 8, 2015 | Leave a Comment

This Week’s Book = 10% Happier: How I Tamed the Voice in My Head, Reduced Stress Without Losing My Edge, and Found Self-Help that Actually Works – A True Story

Oh man, I knew this book was going to be good right from the very first sentence: “I initially wanted to call this book The Voice in My Head Is an Asshole.“[1] I love it. This guy speaks my language. Seriously…I often refer to that inner voice as an asshole when I’m discussing it with clients! This book literally had me laughing out loud – not like quiet, shoulder shaking laughter, but genuine (probably loud) guffaws on the Skytrain. Much like the client who suggested this book to me, I quickly went out and purchased this book after reading the library version.

Ok, so what’s it all about? Well, it’s about Dan Harris’ experiences with anxiety, panic, drug use, and eventually meditation. Harris is an ABC news anchor who had a panic attack on air and this book chronicles his journey of self-change and increased wellness. Because of his super cool job, Harris meets lots of well known self-help/wellness gurus (the Dalai Lama, Eckhart Tolle, and Deepak Chopra to name a few) and he gives his very candid opinion on what they preach. Stigma, Eastern vs. Western medicine, and the support of others are all themes that appear consistently throughout the book.

Even though this isn’t a science based book or a book dedicated to giving readers specific strategies to overcome anxiety, it is an extremely useful and important book. Having dealt with my own anxiety in the past, I found Harris’s words to be familiar. So many of those thoughts went through my own mind! I wish I could’ve read this book back then – I would have known that someone else really understood and I think that would have been quite reassuring. Also, Harris brings the topic of stigma to the forefront. It seems like all of my clients encounter stigma in some way, so having a public figure discuss it openly is pretty important. Lastly, and perhaps most practically, Harris includes an appendix at the end of the book that gives simple instructions on how to meditate and answers all the skeptical and practical questions that may come to mind for readers. He is also pretty open about his own journey with skepticism throughout the book.

I recommend this book to everyone! Seriously – I talk about this book all the time…

Buy the Book!

[1] Dan Harris, 10% Happier: How I Tamed the Voice in My Head, Reduced Stress Without Losing My Edge, and Found Self-Help that Actually Works – A True Story. (HarperCollins, 2014), p. xiii.